Saturday, April 21, 2007

Lets all go to the lobby...

I'm taking a break from posting crap on the blog. I've exhausted myself stealing and reposting from other people blogs.
I want to take a moment and talk about something really important.

To quote Johnny Cash "I see the train a comin'." I want to warn you so you can step out of the way of this rapidly approaching freight train of crap headed right for you and your loved ones.

REMAKES!
To be honest the train has left the station, rounded the bend and is crushing your legs as I type.

Lets see whats in production now:
Well we all know Halloween is being reworked by Rob Zombie. So is ESCAPE FROM NEW YORK. Hmmm. come to think of it... Has John Carpenter sold the rights to every damn film he has done?
We have already had a couple of Carpenter remakes. THE FOG, ASSAULT ON PRECINCT 13 and now HALLOWEEN. Whats next? A remake of a remake with THE THING?
DAMN RIGHT! THE THING is now in preproduction. This is not a remake of the original THING but the John Carpenter version.

Lets see... what else is being remade... OH look at this! For fuck sake here is one horse that has been beaten to death, revived, beaten to death again, came back as a zombie beaten undead, came back as a ghost, and still was beaten and now is a cyborg horse who cannot be beaten.
Dear god get ready for yet another INVASION OF THE BODY SNATCHERS. This time with Nicole (I already did a remake) Kidman.
But this one is different it has a happy ending.

Lets see... WESTWORLD is in production by Warner Bros.

I now regret my tattoo as THE PRISONER is being made into a feature film and an updated BBC series.


OMEGA MAN is now The Will Smith blockbuster I AM LEGEND.

Any more???

update: Holy crap there is more! THE DAY THE EARTH STOOD STILL is being remade by Fox. WHY?

2 comments:

laurenbove said...

"There is nothing new in the world except the history you do not know."
-- Harry Truman

Timo said...

the original, non-carpenter "thing" is extremely underrated.

it's clear to me that no-one has any original ideas anymore.

even movies that are not remakes are often tributes or obvious rip offs.

blah.